Letter from Irish mother
to Irish son

Dear Son
I'm writing this letter slow
because I know you can't read fast.
We don't live where we did
when you left home.
Your dad read in the newspaper
that most accidents happen within 20 miles from your home, so we moved.
I won't be able to send you
the address because the last Irish family that lived here took the house
numbers when they moved so that they wouldn't have to change their address.
This place is really nice.
It even has a washing machine.
I'm not sure it works so well
though: last week I put a load in and pulled the chain and haven't seen
them since.
The weather isn't bad here.
It only rained twice last week; the first time for three days and the second
time for four days.
About that coat you wanted
me to send you, your Uncle Stanley said it would be too heavy to send in
the mail with the buttons on, so we cut them off and put them in the pockets.
John locked his keys in the
car yesterday. We were really worried because it took him two hours
to get me and your father out.
Your sister had a baby this
morning; but I haven't found out what it is yet so I don't know if your
an aunt or an uncle.
The baby looks just like your
brother....
Uncle Ted fell in a whiskey
vat last week. Some men tried to pull him out, but he fought them
off playfully and drowned.
We had him cremated and he
burned for three days.
Three of your friends went
off a bridge in a pick-up truck.
Ralph was driving. He
rolled down the window and swam to safety.
Your other two friends were
in back.
They drowned because they couldn't
get the tailgate down.
There isn't much more news
at this time. Nothing much has happened.
Love, Mum
P.S. I was going to send
you some money but the envelope was already sealed.
|