1.  A Christmas tree is always erect.
2.  Even small ones give satisfaction.
3.  A Christmas tree stays up for 12 days and nights.
4.  A Christmas tree always looks good - even with the lights on.
5.  A Christmas tree is always happy with its size.
6.  A Christmas tree has cute balls.
7.  A Christmas tree doesn't get mad if you break one of its balls.
8.  You can throw a Christmas tree out when it's past its 'sell by' date.
9.  You don't have to put up with a Christmas tree all year.